“A great relationship is about two things: First, appreciating the similarities and second, respecting the differences.”
A nurturing relationship is like a tree, which offers respite from the scorching heat of life events, whereas a bad relationship can totally tarnish your perception of everything you will ever see. Whether it is between lovers or friends or siblings, it takes time & effort to maintain healthy relationships. To start a relationship is easier, but to sustain one requires constant inputs and sacrifices from both ends. The increasing demand of a fast paced lifestyle has led to complications in our sweet associations and more often than not, our personal life suffers due to the professional one. But, if you just pause and ask yourself, whether your job was more important than your relationship, you will hear a heartfelt no and if you ask yourself ‘Are you working hard in the professional to help the personal one blossom?’ you answer most probably will be a yes then why do we fall short of the affection that is required in a relationship?
We are just running to reach the next red light, pushing to reach another halt and trying to make it big by stepping over our loved ones. This article is specially dedicated to maintaining healthy relationships between lovers, but most of these points can be applied to a friendly, sisterly, brotherly relationships as well.
Seven Ways to Improve Your Existing Relationship
- Smartphones: Not so smart
This is one of the growing causes of trouble in the paradise. We often spent more time than we should on our smart phones trying to show off our personal bliss to people who do not even matter. We have to unplug and start to really live in the bliss that is in front of us rather than showing off how blissful it is. Social media has been reported as a growing cause of cheating, heartbreak, jealousy and unhappiness. As per an online health magazine health.com, “A study published in Computers in Human Behavior looked at data from 1,160 married people and found a negative correlation between heavy social media use and relationship happiness. “When angry, some people may turn to texting to avoid saying something..It’s a way of creating distance.” Also, people tend to compare their relationships with that of others without really knowing what one must be going through in their personal journey.
- Match the timings
A family that eats together, sleeps together, stays together and this is true. People tend to bind themselves to their work and are unable to eat any meal together or even sleep at the same time. If a couple cannot spend the whole day together due to separate jobs they can still find time to sleep & eat at the same time. This way they can enjoy the alone time and actually cuddle up. Cuddling sends positive signals to the brain and create a sense of harmony between the two.
- Reminiscing is good
Every couple has their share of happy and funny incidents and flipping back to an old memory can be a way to rekindle the same passion and fire between the two. Allowing the positive moments to hurl back creates a greater level of satisfaction and enthuses higher connection because when you can laugh together you know you can trust that person and also reminds you that they make you happy. And if you are confused as to what you should talk about, it could be anything from a college incident to a fun incident that happened the first time you met. Go back down the memory lane to redraw positive feelings.
- Appreciation is appreciated
When was the last time you gave a compliment to your partner or went out of the way to make them feel special? I know this might sound clichéd and something you already know, but are you practicing it? Just tell your wife how beautiful she is or tell your husband they mean a lot to you and see their eyes glitter with the kind words. Communication is the base of every relationship and sometimes a kind gesture or a few words can change the whole scenario. For once don’t be a nagging someone, no one wants to hang out with. Studies say that the first word of conversation often defines the entire interaction.
- Invest time otherwise
Yes, this is absolutely true. Distance does make the heart go founder and it is required that you find time apart from each other, other than work. When you have other stuff to do, firstly, you are not dependent on each other for everything and this also reminds the other person about how much they miss you. Take up a hobby that you know is something only you will like & let your better half spent time in the activities they like to do. It could be any activity that will offer you the confidence and freedom like pottery, painting, swimming, sketching etc.
- Fit to fit
Now that you know that taking up a hobby apart from each other will aid in keeping your relationship more alive and ticking, yet another thing you can do is to take up a gym or fitness class together. This is like seeing each other grow into something better. Health magazine mentions that ”Endorphins from exercise give you an adrenaline rush that boosts arousal..Any kind of arousal rush can be transferred to your partner and add passion to your relationship.” If you cannot make out time for gym together, you can take up a hiking trip or a small weekend kickboxing class. This will make you want to go back to each other all the more.
- The little joys
It is not the bigger gestures that always count rather the little joys of life are the ones that make our lives simpler and more enjoyable. Next time when your spouse does something for you acknowledge it rather than taking it for granted. Little gestures of kindness depicts a relationship that will last longer than the one with no or very less acknowledgement for each other. Offer a back rub or a foot massage or simply do the dishes or offer dropping them to their office. Life is too short to wait for the right moments of bigger gesture, let’s make it happen right here, right now.
Emotions cannot be driven to a certain point of fulfillment, all we can hope to do is try and make it work. Practice these few points in your relationship and let us know how effective you found them.